"Nothing to worry about folks, please return to your seats."

No, no one wants to kill us.  There is no threat posed by terrorists.  The War on Terror was a mistake and it is more important to give illegals drivers licenses.

This little tidbit offers so much 'feel good' warm and fuzzies about flying I get tingly...

"A second pilot said that, on one of his recent flights, an air marshal forced his way into the lavatory at the front of his plane after a man of Middle Eastern descent locked himself in for a long period. 

The marshal found the mirror had been removed and the man was attempting to break through the wall. The cockpit was on the other side. "